sweat

I got a phone call on Tuesday from the doctor's office, asking me if Simon has been tested for Cystic Fibrosis. I said that he had had his heel prick test as a baby. Considering he is 8 and a half years old, you would imagine that if he actually had CF, it would have revealed itself by now. But, as nasal polyps are co-morbid with CF, the surgeon will not operate until he is tested for CF. Whatever. Thankfully the hospital was able to fit me in yesterday to get this test done. So I had to organise for someone to watch Ruby, take Simon out of school and go to the hospital for a hour and a half while he was tested. It is a non invasive test, they just stuck a plastic disc on his arm and collected a bit of sweat in it, after he had been wrapped in blankets for 45 minutes. So then i took him back to school and went and got Ruby. I realise they have to be thorough, but come on! So now we are waiting for the results before the surgery can go ahead. As it isn't for another 2 weeks I'm sure it will be fine.

I am just so stressed at the moment, I don't know what is wrong with me. I feel like all the joy is being sucked out of me, and I am so mean and cranky and grumpy to the kids. The other night I was cooking dinner and they all came downstairs from their bath and started milling around the counter, all talking and pushing, and then they started chasing the dog, who had been lying asleep at my feet, and for a brief second I had to lean on the bench because I couldn't breathe and I felt like my heart was about to stop. Ruby has just been soooooo difficult recently, and it seems like she saves it up just for me. She starts fighting with me almost the minute she wakes up. The times she is good I praise her and do special things with her, to try and reinforce the good stuff, but that's hard to do when so much is negative. This morning she had a screaming tantrum about wanting to watch tv, which they aren't allowed on school mornings, until after everything is done and ready. This then sets Declan off, who also starts screaming because Ruby is screaming. Ugh. Someone pass the valium.